Restarting dedicated flexibility work

[AlexanderEgebak]

12 hours ago, Gareth O Connor said:

Where do you think the tension comes from Alexander?

From a lifetime of swimming against the current of my true self, metaphorically speaking.

[Kit_L]

8 hours ago, AlexanderEgebak said:

From a lifetime of swimming against the current of my true self, metaphorically speaking.

So let it go, already!

The somatic and emotional work you mentioned in the earlier post can all be addressed, directly and indirectly, by developing a relaxation practice. I have a deep background in (and still run a practice in) stress management, and the advice that I continue to give you is based on excellent scientific and empirical work over many decades.

A question to ask yourself, I suggest, is what is the root of the incredible resistance you have to simply lying down for 20 minutes, listening to a step-by-step proven formula that relaxes you?

[Gareth O Connor]

The tension is probably from years of pressing down your emotions. You're an analytical man however the intellect can be used to distance oneself from one's feelings.. Freud called it intellectualisation

[Gareth O Connor]

Keep up the singing lessons,sing for the sheer enjoyment of singing don't do it for an instrumental purpose.

[Gareth O Connor]

What do you mean by swimming against the current of your true self?

[AlexanderEgebak]

On 1/16/2025 at 1:17 AM, Gareth O Connor said:

The tension is probably from years of pressing down your emotions. You're an analytical man however the intellect can be used to distance oneself from one's feelings.. Freud called it intellectualisation

I know, compartmentalization is something I am working on! I have affinity for being analytical, in its purest form still present without distance to my emotions, so thats what Im trying to connect to. Singing is one such way, singing for the purest joyful expression but also combined with a healthy and nerdy, perfectionistic mindset.

If swimming is the act of navigating through (a river of) life in all its forms, then swimming against the current is the action of using willpower to achieve goals not sufficiently aligned with desire, habits, emotions and internal motivation. If willpower is an expendable ressource to navigate less meaningful circumstances, and that entirely is whats keeping you afloat, you will eventually fatigue. In a sense, our desires, habits, emotions and internal motivations can be said to contain (a perspective of) our true self, and figuratively we can either drift along or "fight our current". Realizing that the river moves and changes regardless of our swimming  opens up to seeing the choice of swimming with or against our true selves.

In my current (no pun intended) context, I am exhausted of things that I "must do" that falls outside the 4 established factors of my true self. Letting go without using willpower is a skill I am still working on which is also why I am still hesitant of starting mindfullness practice. It will be forced, sporadic and draining to initiate. Too much resistance to the benefits I do perceive being pertained within the practice.

On another note my posterior tilt is improving more by days. I have less soreness around my spine, and during hip flexor stretches, split squats and pancake stretch I have way more control, can shift tension and make ad-hoc meaningful changes. I am still far from where I want to be but I appreciate starting to "lift the curse".

I had the flue recently which forced to make me sleep on my back, basically without turning all night. I lost a lot of tension which makes me conclude that I tend to sleep in weird and twisted shapes, nudged by the pelvis position and spinal tension I believe.

[Gareth O Connor]

You're doing well

[Gareth O Connor]

Regarding perfectionism,I struggle with it,I think we don't need to be perfect it is enough to be human

[Gareth O Connor]

Donald Winnicott the pediatrician and psychoanalyst said the true self is spontaneous and alive while the false self is compliant to the demands of other people while feeling empty and dead inside 

[AlexanderEgebak]

On 2/13/2025 at 10:53 PM, Gareth O Connor said:

Donald Winnicott the pediatrician and psychoanalyst said the true self is spontaneous and alive while the false self is compliant to the demands of other people while feeling empty and dead inside 

What you are describing aligns closely with the definitions of "ego", an illusion of the Self. If the true self is dynamic and unrestricted, the ego is maintaining a calcified and distorted version of the self, negotiated and perceived through interactions with others.
 

On 2/13/2025 at 10:42 PM, Gareth O Connor said:

Regarding perfectionism,I struggle with it,I think we don't need to be perfect it is enough to be human

We just need to "be". Likewise, striving for perfection can also be seen as a simple result of "being", if unpolluted by agency of the ego.

[Gareth O Connor]

Bruce Lee be like water

[AlexanderEgebak]

A small update:

The numbness and restlessness from lower back down my leg to my foot has been receding which supports an idea that nerve irritation have at least partially subsided. Being able to relax while sitting or lying down is a very welcome change. It also allowed me, especially after exercising, to intuitively rest on my back and stomach (tight neck know) instead of being confined to "side-sleeping".

I am still grinding out the flexibility work. I am especially seeing progress with my pancake worth. Actively rotating and abducting my hips to prevent SI-joint glide which results in hip adduction, internal rotation and lumbar spine lateral shift and rotation. It has become easier and more relaxed which has significantly improved cold flexibility and proficiency in press handstand work. Form in hip flexor stretches and Bulgarian split squats improved, though its still challenging to ensure a hip flexor stretch and during squats to avoid QL-involvement.

I have noticed foam rolling, cobra poses and bridge work specifically can cause spinal manipulation that drastically improves flexibility work afterwards. I am treating this as relaxation stretches and trying to relax into a "pop".

Other than that strength has also improved. Doing 4 reps of 40kg pull ups now, bent over rows 70 kg 8 reps, dips with 60 kg 5 reps with increased depth and improved form, dumbbell overhead press 2x40 kg 5 reps now, biceps curls 35 kg 10 reps.

Making progress on the mental aspects as well. I have successfully let go of some illusions/delusions which held a firm grip on my energy. Having my energy not leaking from these circumstances anywhere I am able to direct more energy to my master thesis work in law studies. Eventually, attempting to give a lying relaxation practice a serious shot, being mindful of your points @Kit_L. Im moving closer.

[Gareth O Connor]

You're going well

[Gareth O Connor]

How are your studies going?

[AlexanderEgebak]

Hey Gareth.

I am currently writing my master's thesis in law studies. The writing is going well but I suppose its part of the process to feel as if you are never quite satisfied with the progress. I will be handing in the thesis in June and defend it shortly after. Imagine that - 9.5 years of studying, only briefly disrupted by physiotherapy work, is coming to an end!

[Gareth O Connor]

That's a lot of work.Good on you for being persistent I don't think I'd have the patience to study for 9.5 years

[CharlieG]

Thank you so much for another great thread. I've struggled with lower pack pain following a recurrence of "hip shift" that Kit has explored in other threads in these forums. 

I am going to focus on the recommendations Kit mentioned above (1) relaxation practices (which I haven't done yet at all); and (2) a stretching routine focusing on hip flexor stretches (incl. partner HF) / piriformis (as this is particularly tight for me) once or twice per week and then limbering on the other days. I already do quite a bit of single leg strength work as part of my strength training. 

My question is whether the heel lift is still relevant if you are not experiencing enormous pain? I have done the standing leg test and estimate that my right leg is slightly shorter but it doesn't look drastically wrong without the heel lift either. My main indicator is that it feels slightly more natural when my right heel is raised ever so slightly. My pain has started to ease in the last month or so since starting to follow Kit's stretching videos on youtube but for some reason I still do not feel comfortable going back to what I want to (which is get back to playing squash regularly). I read from Kit in another thread that he only used the heel lift when his "back was particularly fragile" so I'm wondering whether to use a heel lift, as instinctively I don't want to use one unnecessarily as I'm not in agony anymore. I know I'm carrying a lot of tension in my shoulders (more on one side because of the nature of the sport so I'm assuming relaxing/stretching/limbering is the best place to start). This post lacks a lot of context but just super grateful for any guidance on this. 

Thank you so much for all of this - I'm still discovering a lot on here. Reading these forums has been a real source of inspiration but now is time for less reading/writing and more stretching/relaxing. 

[Kit_L]

In my humble opinion, the best way to come to a conclusion about whether or not to use a lift is to try it, and see what happens. There is no downside to this approach. If you try it and you don't like it, stop using it. I used a heel lift, as I've written about elsewhere, when my back was particularly fragile and it was a lifesaver for me. The relief was instantaneous. If I recall correctly, I used to heel lift for about two years until my back settled down. And now talking about many years later, I've been barefoot for 15 years and never use any lift of any kind and my leg length difference is still exactly the same. If your back is not a particular problem at the moment, then it's up to you whether you use one, or try one, or not.

What I wrote in Overcome neck & back pain is that if the difference that you find using the standard leg-length test (which is available free on YouTube) is not large, and you cannot come to a strong view on whether there's a significant difference or not, concentrate on the flexibility tests the same text talks about. Most important are comparing hip flexor flexibility left and right.

[CharlieG]

Thanks Kit, thanks for taking the time to respond. Very helpful. 

[CharlieG]

Hi @Kit_L - I'm doing the floor hip flexor stretch (exercise 7 on OCBP) and sense two issues and I'm not sure if this means I'm not doing the stretch properly: (1) I can easily put my hands on the floor, but my back is still very rounded and I really struggle to "straighten" the back as you describe in the video, and (2) I don't feel it on the front of the "back" leg, but rather in the hip of the leg with the bent knee. Any advice would be much appreciated! 

[Kit_L]

Simple: put your hands on a support that's high enough to allow you to straighten your back—right now, you are not flexible enough in the front legs hip to straighten your back, that's all. And in the beginning, it's very common to feel quite a strong stretch in the back of the front leg as well, up near the glute. Once everything settles down, then you use your hands to pull yourself forward while trying to lift your chest to straighten the upper back, and that will make the stretch go into the top of the back leg. Let us know how you go.

[AlexanderEgebak]

Some time ago since last update. I have been going through a great deal of personal things, among them cancer in my closest family and me and my partner breaking up three days before thesis deadline. I have had my bad luck dishes of a life time being served to me the last 5 years. Luckily, I made it through, wrote a very well received thesis, defended it well and I am now a proud lawyer and physiotherapist at the same time!

I am using these days to find myself again and recover from some very tough 6 months. The opportunity now is a hard reset of my self image. Seeing the positives in the negatives, there is no complacency trap. My body is way more relaxed and less tense despite the training having been on a back burner for some time. Still low on mental ressources, but they will come.

I am following a guy on instagram called "lowbackability" who has a series of hip/glute/spine exercises which are really effective for my issues. I plan to do them everyday eventually; currently they are the mainstay warmup for all lower body stretching as they immediately unlock my full range of motion! Meanwhile I am still hard focused on psoas/RF stretch and both are getting better.

I am also paying attention to too much sitting and my computer setup where I have a tendency of rotating and flexing my spine which brings annoyances from sitting too long.

[Kit_L]

Congratulations on defending your thesis. In Australia, a bachelor of law degree does not have include theses to defend. Were you doing a Masters by any chance?

And sorry to hear about your family misfortunes – we have had six people die in our immediate family since Covid, so we do understand this. Best wishes from over here.

[AlexanderEgebak]

On 6/24/2025 at 12:52 AM, Kit_L said:

Congratulations on defending your thesis. In Australia, a bachelor of law degree does not have include theses to defend. Were you doing a Masters by any chance?

And sorry to hear about your family misfortunes – we have had six people die in our immediate family since Covid, so we do understand this. Best wishes from over here.

Thank you Kit!

Its been a tough time. My brother was cleared, and now we are awaiting results of preliminary tests for my mother. Im hanging on. Things are better now and Im focusing on rebuilding myself for my new life.

Yes, I defended my master's thesis. For context: 2012-2015 law bachelor's degree, 1 year of sports science, 3.5 years of physiotherapy, 3 years in clinic, then 2 year master of laws. At 32 years old that is a lot! Looking forward to finding work which may hold and value my different skill sets.

[AlexanderEgebak]

I also just realized that I joined this site a little more than 10 years ago! Thats crazy! How times have changed!