Shaping the body; adjusting the mind

[jaja]

• Bench Press: 1x4x80kg + 1x5x77,5kg + 1x6x72,5kg
  • Number down, as expected, but solid form
• Chin-ups: 1x4xBW+15kg + 1x5xBW+7,5 + 1x7xBW
  • Same as above; I could definitively feel my lower bodyweight helping me throughout the exercise
• Anti-pronation exercise: 1x8x20kg
• Ankle mobility
  • Some drills, a couple of static stretches (C&R)
• Low-bar squat with feet flat on the ground: 1x50kg
  • I'm going to experiment with moderate weight, until I'll be comfortable enough to try squatting seriously. I feel this exercise could be a nice drill for my ankles. Sadly I didn't have time for more sets, today.

[jaja]

• Bent Over Row: 1x6x70kg + 1x8x67,5kg + 1x8x65kg
  • Had to start with these because the gym was packed and I had to wait for the squat rack. Managed to increase the weight. Wasn't easy and could have used a better form, but overall I'm happy.
• Squat: 1x2x115kg + 1x3x105kg + 1x4x95kg + 1x5x85kg
  • Numbers down a lot. DL and squats suffered a lot for last week's setback. Maybe it was the stress, maybe the illness, maybe the improper sleep&nutrition (followed by weight loss), maybe all of that combined. Hopefully I'll gain all my strength back fast. On the bright side, I was able to really fire my posterior chain.
• Dead hangs: 2 sets
  • 1m30s + 1m10s ; could have done more, probably.

That's all. I had limited time, so no stretching today.

[jaja]

The new job is time consuming and stressful, so I devoted a huge chunk of this afternoon to cultivate relaxation in the body. I stopped my daily yoga nidra practice a week ago because I was sick, so I really needed to discharge some tension. I also stretched my neck&jaw and did a deep massage on my jaw muscles using my knuckles. It felt reeeeeaaaally good, but it wasn't enough: I still feel a lot of tensione around my eyes.

[jaja]

Stretching Sunday:

 

• Partner HF Stretch
• Partner Piriformis Stretch
• Stick calves roll
• Gastrocnemius massage with partner's knee
• Adductors massage with partner's heel
• Stick neck massage
• Partner Shoulder Pushdown
• Jaw self-massage
• Jaw Stretch

[jaja]

Lunch break workout

• Deadlift: 1x2x130kg + 1x6x107,5kg
  • I loaded the bar a proceeded to lift 135kg, as usual…but I couldn't do it. I deloaded and managed to lift 130kg only twice. This is my first real setback and feels like a punch in the face.
• Chin-ups: 4xAMRAP (11-8-6-5)
  • Not great, but not bad
• Dead hangs: 2 sets
  • 1m20s ; 40s ; even here, poor performance
• Ankle mobility (mostly limbering)
• Low-bar paused squats (feet flat on the ground): 2x8x50kg
  • I was really focused on loading evenly both legs. Felt a lot in the quads.

 

--------

 

During today morning meditation (30 minutes) I had my attention locked on the breath, but at the same time I was distracted by thoughts. It was like I had a thin translucent, layer of thoughts between me and my object of focus.

[Nathan]

10 hours ago, jaja said:

This is my first real setback and feels like a punch in the face.

Or you could say, "this is what I was capable of today." Not managing to hit numbers from a recent session and getting upset about it is a funny thing. We all do it (I sure do, anyway), but when you think about it objectively, it's obvious that your muscles haven't suddenly become weaker in a matter of days. There is strength, and then there is the expression of that strength. You might actually be stronger, but not manage to express that strength because of various factors. Nothing to worry about. If it happens for several sessions in a row, then you can take another look at your training.

10 hours ago, jaja said:

It was like I had a thin translucent, layer of thoughts between me and my object of focus.

They say that we're not capable of true multi-tasking. Even so, I think spending so many years attempting to do so has changed my brain. I've probably just gotten very, very good at rapidly switching. I will often have thoughts arising in the background while (seemingly?) remaining focused on the breath. I just let them do their thing and continue doing mine.

[jaja]

14 hours ago, Nathan said:

They say that we're not capable of true multi-tasking. Even so, I think spending so many years attempting to do so has changed my brain. I've probably just gotten very, very good at rapidly switching. I will often have thoughts arising in the background while (seemingly?) remaining focused on the breath. I just let them do their thing and continue doing mine.

I actually remember having this problem, years ago, when I thought I was “good” at meditating. Back than I managed to deepen my focus by putting more effort into focusing. Now this seems to just increase the muscular tension.

[jaja]

The unpredictability of my new job, coupled with the long working days is forcing me to be very flexible with my training. Second day in a row, today.

• Chin-ups: 1x5xBW+15kg + 1x7xBW+7,5 + 1x8xBW
  • Good!
• Bench Press: 1x4x80kg + 1x5x77,5kg + 1x3x72,5kg
  • Not so good, not at all. I expected to suffer a bit, the third set was quite shocking.
• Anti-pronation exercise: 1x8x20kg
• Ankle mobility
  • Spent some quality time here
• Low-bar paused squats (feet flat on the floor): 3x8x60kg
  • Added a little more weight than yesterday, no problem whatsoever!
• Finger curls (pronated grip): 2x12x40kg

[jaja]

It's been a week or so since I decided to mediate for 30 minutes and stick with that length no matter what. It was the right decision: my thought stream typically starts to settle around the 20th minute. Incidentally my body start relaxing at the same time. The quality of my session is far from constant: one day I'm able to sit comfortably and let my mind calm down, the other I have thoughts racing till the end (not to mention the muscular tension).

I'm still doing yoga nidra, often at lunch break, and noticing improvements in my overall state. The sessions themselves are pleasant, although I've not yet experienced a deep relaxation. I've managed to soften my neck muscles as well as my diaphragm, which is really nice and has impacted the way my voice sound. This progress is not yet consolidated, since tension is quick to come back.

[jaja]

Last week I couldn't train 3 times because I was too busy (and my gym close too early in the evening), so I skipped my squat day. Today I resumed the training.

• Deadlift: 1x4x130kg + 1x6x117,5kg
  • An improvement over last week, albeit still quite far from my pre-sickness numbers
• Chin-ups: 4xAMRAP (12-8-7-6)
  • Happy with this!
• Dead hangs: 2 sets
  • 1m20s + 1m ; I wonder why my grip got this bad: I remember few weeks ago I got like 1m40s!
• Ankle mobility
  • Really quick session, I was running out of time
• Low-bar squats (feet flat on the floor): 3x8x70kg
  • These were supposed to be paused squats, but the load was a bit too challenging to do a proper pause and still be focused on equal weight distribution between my feet. My LLD makes difficult to proper force distribution. 

[Kit_L]

On 3/12/2019 at 12:13 AM, jaja said:

my thought stream typically starts to settle around the 20th minute. Incidentally my body start relaxing at the same time.

Not incidental: one's muscle tonus (L. for 'tension') is exactly a reflection of one's mental state. One technical term for this is isomorphic (western psychology and physiology separate the physical and mental, but this separation is not real in the lived experience).

The greater the agitation or anxiety, the higher the tension; the greater the experience of calm, the more the body relaxes. When in the delta state (the deepest/slowest state of mental activity), or under anaesthetic, there is little to no muscle tone, and the body can be moved into any position the skeleton can accommodate. Some practitioners can remain fully awake in this state, too.

[jaja]

13 hours ago, Kit_L said:

Some practitioners can remain fully awake in this state, too.

I hope to reach this state, someday. (And hoping so will of course move me away from it).

[jaja]

Short workout during lunch break.

• Bench Press: 1x4x80kg + 1x5x77,5kg + 1x6x72,5kg

Same Numbers than last time, but I felt more in control of the movement

• Chin-ups: 1x5xBW+15kg + 1x7xBW+7,5 + 1x8xBW

Failed my 6th rep, so no progress. However I trained with a full stomach (and hopefully I’m regaining some weight), so I’m positive

• Anti-pronation exercise: 1x8x16kg

Deloased a bit to focus more on muscle activation on my weaker side

[jaja]

• Squat: 1x4x115kg + 1x5x105kg + 1x6x95kg + 1x7x85kg
  • Felt my right leg firing much more than usual. Good!
• Bent Over Row: 1x7x70kg + 1x9x67,5kg + 1x8x65kg
• Dead hangs: 2 sets
  • 1m30s + 1m10s

 

---------------

 

Yesterday, at some point during yoga nidra, I felt a restlessness I've rarely experienced (if ever). It was like my body didn't want to stay still, I was impatient, I wanted to move. I was able to relax only for 10 minutes or so.

 

----------------

 

Got invited to play soccer with my coworkers. I accepted because it's an opportunity to socialize and because it's something slightly out my confort zone. Yet I am afraid to damage my knee in some ways. I'll try to be cautious and I will wear my knee brace, but I'm still worried. Is there anything else I should do?

[Nathan]

4 hours ago, jaja said:

Yet I am afraid to damage my knee in some ways.

I would suggest that this might be more of an issue than anything that might actually happen while playing. Fearing a bad outcome could easily lead to convincing yourself that something bad happened when it was really nothing. And we know how powerful convincing yourself of something can be 

I would say be mindful of it and have confidence that doing so will be enough for your body to protect itself.

[jaja]

Given my upcoming soccer match, I decided to train on Sunday instead than on Monday as I usually do.

• Deadlift: 1x5x130kg + 1x6x117,5kg
  • My gym decided to add some padding at the side of the DL platform. As a result the barbell isn't at feet level anymore, it's slightly elevated (2cm). I don't know how this will affect my training, nor if there's some downside in terms of strength gains. Today I felt the exercise a bit more on my mid back than usual. 
• Chin-ups: 4xAMRAP (12-7-7-5)
  • Slightly worse than last time, but I'm ok with it
• Dead hangs: 2 sets
  • 1m30s + 40s ; saaaaaad
• Ankle mobility
• Low-bar Squats with feet flat on the floor: 3x8x70kg
  • Squatting with elevated heels has primed me to initiate the push with the balls of my feet. Doing this while squatting with feet flat on the floor causes the bar path to not be vertical. From now on I'm gonna focus on pushing through the heels.
• Overhead press: messed around a bit with the movement.

 

Sunday Stretching:

 

• Partner HF Stretch
• Scalenes Stretch
• Human Crossbow
• Table chest opener
• Partner Shoulders Pushdown
• Partner Unilateral Shoulder Pushdown (with neck flexion)

----

30 minutes of meditation: was too distracted, I'm not even sure this session counts

[Nathan]

14 hours ago, jaja said:

As a result the barbell isn't at feet level anymore, it's slightly elevated (2cm). I don't know how this will affect my training, nor if there's some downside in terms of strength gains.

It will make the lift slightly easier, but I wouldn't worry about 2cm. You can always stand on something 2cm thick if it bothers you 

Edit: Also...

14 hours ago, jaja said:

30 minutes of meditation: was too distracted, I'm not even sure this session counts

You already know this, but if you did it, it counts 

[Kit_L]

^ ^ ^

What he said! ANY meditation session counts; the more distracted you are, and the ore you bring yourself back to your meditation object, the more you are developing concentration (and mindfulness: you noticed that you were distracted). 

And essential to press away though the heels, too, in the DL.

[jaja]

I know, I know. I know this since the very beginning. Yet I manage to always get frustrated by “bad sessions”. 😓

Stretching, this evening

 

• Wall quad stretch
  • Sensations in my right leg were much less detailed. It felt somewhat numb. Strange.
• Tailor pose stretch
  • Getting better with this!
• Stick calves roll
• Calves stretch
• Scalenes Stretch
  • Already stretched them yesterday. Tried it again today because I wanted to dig deeper on my left side. Something was still off, maybe I missed the right angle.

The “Partner Unilateral Shoulder Pushdown (with neck flexion)” I did yesterday was killer: today I experienced a great freedom in my neck! There's still a knot I need to untie, but maybe I'm on the right path!

 

[Kit_L]

22 hours ago, jaja said:

I know, I know. I know this since the very beginning. Yet I manage to always get frustrated by “bad sessions”. 😓

 

See if this helps, next time: say to yourself, "Here's that pesky mind again, doing what it does best!", then smile, and make a conscious effort to relax completely. Smiling is the critical part: it takes any negative feelings away. Truly, there are no bad sessions.

Edited March 19, 2019 by Kit_L

[jaja]

So…tonight I played soccer for the first time after 5-6 years. I was severely de-conditioned, but my body held up quite good, regardless of the occasional rough play. Some considerations below:

 

• I'm not even remotely fast as I used to be. Maybe I should consider a sprinting training, this summer.
• I could feel my breath was constricted. I'm tired of this, I need to let go of the tension I hold in my torso.
• My whole right leg is weak. Not just weaker than the other one, but too weak to remain injury free in the long run.
  • Interestingly the weakest link isn't the knee, but the ankle. I could feel it struggling to keep the ground or to propel me properly. It's at risk of spraining, really. Question is: how do I condition it?
  • Discomfort in my right ankle. I've probably lost some degree of dorsiflexion.
  • The knee suffered a bit, I need more muscle mass around it.
• Left leg was a beast. I could feel the fibers of my quad contracting to preserve the joint, as I stopped and suddenly changed direction.
• Overall I'm now much more aware of my body than I was 5 years ago.
• I ran out of breath quickly.
• I now can't stop coughing. As long as I can remember, after a long time spent running I've always had this problem.
• My shoulder joints felt vulnerable. I need strength there.
• Near the end of the game, while I was playing as a goalkeeper, the ball hit my left hand hard. I was not prepared and I suffer a mild trauma. I'm no experiencing pain/discomfort when I bend and rotate the wrist, as well as when I grip hard with a pinching movement. Probably nothing than some active rest can't solve…but I don't know if it's a good idea to hit the bench, this week. We'll see. Anyway, wrists are another weak link I need to strengthen.
• I need more coordination. A lot more.

[Kit_L]

21 hours ago, jaja said:

Question is: how do I condition it?

By doing what you want to be able to to with it, in a less stressful way than an actual game. The demands of any activity are way more specific than the mind thinks.

So you remembers all those drills your coach would have given you in the old days when you learned to play soccer: jogs forwards and backwards, sideways. Repeat. Short (10m, 15m) of 60%, 70%, 80% only sprints. Et cetera.

[jaja]

@Kit_L calf rises could be of any help?

[jaja]

Still recovering from the soccer match: legs suffering with DOMS and right wrist still aching. Decided to postpone my bench day and do the squat day first.

• Squat: 1x5x115kg + 1x6x105kg + 1x7x95kg + 1x7x85kg
  • Wrist didn't like it much, but I kept going. Legs were sore, I'm not sure about the depth in my first set.
• Bent Over Row: 1x8x70kg + 1x9x67,5kg + 1x8x65kg
  • Wrist fine, it suffers only when compressed.
• Dead hangs: 2 sets
  • 1m30s + 1m10s. Meh. Wrist fine, but felt some sensations in my left forearm.
• Attempted a warmup set for the overhead press, but stopped immediately: wrist in pain.
• Ankle mobility
  • Calves quite sore, didn't accomplished much
• Weighted calves rises
  • Messed around a bit, nothing serious

Wrist conditioning:

• Wrist curls: 2x10x6kg
• Finger curls: 2x10x6kg

Felt confortabile with those, despite the sensations. I hope doing stuff like this is helpful to accelerate recovery. I've also put some ointment (ketoprofen) on it.

[Kit_L]

14 hours ago, jaja said:

@Kit_L calf rises could be of any help?

Limited, I would say (too slow to be relevant to the stresses of actually running and changing direction). Bounces on the balls of the feet though, are perfect. You only need to bounce enough to leave the floor; I used to do sets of 300 in the shower when I was rehabbing a pulled calf muscle. Just thin of the game: it's dynamic, and any off-field movements for conditioning need to reflect this.